While at lunch the other day, I had a chance to talk to a wonderful woman that I work with. We got to talking about her and her husband. She told me that he was in a nursing home and was suffering from Alzheimers Disease. She was telling me how she went to feed him everyday and how he didnt even know her or that she was there. As she talked about him and their lives together before this disease I could see the pain in her eyes and hear the quiver in her voice. I think that it did her good to have someone to talk to and I was more that happy to listen to her stories.
She was telling me about going to feed him and how she wanted to make sure that she was there on Christmas to be with him and make sure he knew she loved him. And she broke down a little when she told me that he didnt even recognize her anymore. He didnt speak words that anyone could understand anymore and that all he did was stare into space for most of the time. She was telling me of the guilt she felt for not being able to be with him all the time. But that she felt for her health she had to try to keep living as best as she could. She just recently got this job and it was just to help take her mind off of being sad all the time and of being terribly lonely. My heart went out to her and I made sure that she knew I would do anything I could for her and would always be there if she needed to talk or cry or scream.
As I was sitting in my living room later on that evening, I got to thinking how hard it would be for someone you have spent your whole life with to dwindle away in front of your eyes. I can not imagine the pain and loneliness that would be. But I admire this lady for the love she continues to show her husband by visiting him daily and by being there even when he doesnt know her. She could just have put him in a home and left and decided he didnt know or need her anymore but she did not. She continues to try to go on with her life as best as she can and still is there for her love who doesnt see her anymore. Something I definitely want to live up to in my life.
I just wonder if I am with someone who would do the same for me. IF I was to have something happen to me like this would I be alone? Would my husband come and see me even when I couldnt see him? Would he speak of me the way she does her husband with such love and sadness in her eyes.......
